Sunday 13 September 2015

After

This blog has been a witness to my inconsistencies and growth.
Even though it's been really long since I last updated, I keep revisiting this sanctuary of mine at odd hours at night, when insecurities leave me vulnerable. I read my posts, I read your kind comments and I feel like wanting to write again, wanting to write more but then I think of all the work it takes, of how it drains me, because when I write it doesn't come in perfect sentences. I struggle with each line, I fret over the grammar, I worry if what I've written is coherent, I worry if it sounds childish. I take my time, I edit, re-edit, forward it and bug my grammar nazi friends to proofread it.
So yes, although it keeps me on my toes, I remember loving every single second of it. The anticipation after I forward my post or publish it and wait for the first person to read and share their thoughts. The rush of relief and gratitude when I'm appreciated.

So why did I stop, you may ask? Because, just like everyone who gives up a hobby they love would say, Life got in the way and the anticipation, the flood of relief, showers of appreciation faded with time. I forgot how to write or maybe I thought I did, like a lovely dream you once cherished but cannot quite remember anymore.

After a lot of what-ifs, I started bookstagramming this year, met a lot of lovely people (more on that later) and started re-considering the idea of blogging. I contemplated abandoning this blog and starting afresh with a new one. In fact, I did create a new one, but I couldn't go ahead with it. Although the posts here are very few in number, my heart reflects in each word, each comma, each full stop and I realized that I couldn't let it go. That I CANNOT let it go.
So here I am, making a new start.
Only this time without the inconsistencies.

12 comments:

  1. Delighted that you didn't turn your back on blogging. Welcome back!

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    1. You'd be surprised to know how bloggers like yourself have profoundly affected my decision and have kept me going. Thank you, for being a constant support through out my blogging journey, Mr.Jones :)

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  2. Replies
    1. No wait, I have. How do I not remember this blog, have you changed anything recently?
      That picture of you is super adorable :D SO SO so very cute :D

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    2. This is payback for spamming my Instagram :P

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    3. And because I love your blog name.

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    4. Hahahah
      Yes, you have been here before. In fact, your comment on my prev post gives me a boost every time I feel like I'm not good at writing. So thank you, for coming back. I hope you keep coming back to spam my posts with your kind comments! XD
      Yess, I did change the entire look of my blog andd thanks again. And again.
      *hops off to cookiecrumbsinc*

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  3. Firstly, your blog is so so pretty! Love all the watercolours up there!! n_n Also, I can so relate with the drained out bit! Gah! xx

    Jadirah Sarmad | Jasmine Catches Butterflies ʚϊɞ

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    1. You dooo?
      Ahh..coming from you, it must mean something because your blog is goals.
      Yesss, so tiring! But it's worth it, isn't it?
      Thank you for dropping by, Jadirah! <3

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  4. It could have been me writing this post, i.e if I could write so well.. I too started a different blog and closed it, three times till date. Just cannot even imagine moving over to another blog. Loved the blog name too. And your blogger profile DP is super adorable. :)
    Bookdragon ?? Wow !!
    We have so much in common.. Yayyy!!
    I love potterheads by default and I love your blog. Heading over to read more posts..
    Thanks a lot for the comment on mine :)

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    1. Oh, thank God! I thought I was the only one. I guess I'm really attached to my blog, soo..moving is not an option anymore. Thank you, thaank you soo much!
      Yess, we do! Potterheads are my favourite kind of people. I can't wait to read more posts on your blog. Cheers to reading and blogging and to being awesome Potterheads! XD

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